Monday, July 21, 2008

today

hmmm... i might take this out.



We are not perfect, you see..
We can't do everything but yet we can't do nothing.
At times when we thought we doing the right thing... but we're not.
At times when we thought we didn't do shits, but we're simply framed.
At times when we thought we deserve it, but end up.. we don't get it.

At times when all these suddenly happen, how will you feel? who will you blame on?
what will you do? and why these things only happen to you?

Sometimes we work our shit off, hoping to get something in return..
Sometimes we help our friends, hoping help running back one day in return..
Sometimes we say something, hoping to knock some sense in..
Sometimes we treat others well, hoping to be treated well in return..
Sometimes this and that, hoping it will be the same in return..

Well, I think it's better we don't hope for anything back in return.
That will make us feel much better and sincere to ourselves that we are not just seeking for something in return but to do it wholeheartedly as long as we don't feel sorry for ourselves.
Deep in our head, we do hope when we treat someone well or something right, we would want to be paid the same in return.. but what if it didn't happen the way that we utmost wanted it to?
Nonsense will creep up in your mind, conquering your conscience, despising your good wills.

Why the fuck for, right??

Life is already one big mess for us to struggle in.
Why bother adding more frustration into it when you can just avoid shits like this?

Minds are some fucking complication "thing" that ever has created.
It can go zappp and went off the path at any second.
Thinking too much kills.
Thinking too little sucks.
So what?

You can lie tell to yourself millions of answers to soothe yourself.
But deep down, you're just not convinced. Why?
Because they are not the things that you want to know or do or say or feel..

There are times when we're getting all emo and suddenly...
question ourselves of what we thought are "our facts of life"...
like why are we born here with all these illogical sufferings???
or why tat bastard is so fucking rich that I'm not??
or why i'm working so hard but my boss never appreciate me??
Or why is that chick so chio that I don't even have an ugly duckling with me??
Unfairness?? Bias??

Funny thing, when we are to compare good shits rite...
we'll probably be like comparing to Uncle Lim's fortune, Donald Trump's tower, how much Angelina Jolie earn for a movie, those rich tards everywhere in the world etc etc...
but we never compare our life with those died over dehydration, poverty, hunger and etc.. guess nothing is ever enough rite? or should i say gratitude values are not implemented well?

What occur me for this outoftheblue post is that.. yeah.. today is one of those days..
I do have times where I just feel like the whole fucking world just owe a hell lot to me..
but then when I'm cool and all.. stupidity is the only word to describe me.
We do have problems, just depending on how horrendous it can become..
Problems can be solved with the right conscience and mood to attend..
Deep in, we know how to solve anything that affects us...
I guess it's just the matter of how true we are to ourselves..
How much we want to trust the reality that slapped us hard..
People say women have sharp instincts. Men say don't trust it.
Well, we all do have it.
We always have this little voice in us that know best what we should do.
That little voice that speaks it all despite you want to admit it or not. You agree?

Money is not everything.. but without money is also a no-no thing.
I'm not those who crave for money and making impossible goals as wanting to make first millions before in 2 years time or whatso.
I know my capabilities, my needs and what I want from myself in this life.
(at least for the time being, i'm happy with the life i am in now)

What I want to achieve with no hanky-panky tricks, desperation do occurs sometimes...
but.. narh.. i'll pass... I really need a clear conscience..
Guess some of you will think, I have got no high aims or goals for a richer life..
marry a rich man, becoming a rich aunty, in a big mansion made of gold..
Oh well, I think I know where my "enough" limit is.

And to this specific you, I'm all ears.
I listened but I couldn't make decision for you.
I really want good shits out of you..
I've known you for years and I really think you don't deserve shits like now..
You can so do much better.. Faith is that freaking F word.
Just make the fucking right choice and give your life a new kickstart.

Sometimes in the real shit-world, we really need to thicken our face in order to live.
Be someone we're not, hell no for me.





i know a lot of ppl dont agree this post with me, thinking i'm so immature..
not ready for the real farkddap world..
well, this is what i think now la.. who knows it might change.
no guarantees as the world turns.

blek

2 comments:

backstreetgluttons said...

Surely u will change when the time comes. Even tho u dun need to really

wah so full of luminous inner glare 2night !
haha (nice lovely dangerous passionate song)

Michelle said...

BSG!!!! HUGS!!!! a big huggies for u.. XXXX